Managing Back-to-School Nerves
- Paul Aguirre, LCSW-R
- Aug 27
- 4 min read
Updated: Aug 29
Paul Aguirre, Director, CHC's Baker Family Emotional Health and Wellness Center
When we were eight – or twelve – or nineteen, who among us doesn’t recall jitters starting to set in as Labor Day approached? The afternoons growing cooler… our sun-drenched activities drawing to a close… the buying of new school supplies, always irrefutable proof that summer was done…
Nowadays, "jitters" has been more accurately rebranded as anxiety, and I asked CHC’s EHWC staff to share how they managed angst as September loomed when they were growing up, and how those same anxieties can resonate with kids today.
CHC's Mental Health Staff Weigh In
Tyler Nellissen, one of our valued psychotherapists, recalls fear of the unknown:
When I think about going back to school, I think about fear of the unknown. Would I have difficulty with classwork? Would my friends be in the same class with me? But mostly I remember trying to stay organized. At the start of the term, I would try to be neat, with different labels and folders for each class. But I was overscheduled—so busy running between classes and afterschool activities that I didn't have time to keep track of things. By the end of the year, I would have one giant binder with loose papers everywhere, containing stuff for all my subjects!
Kate Salvatore, our staff psychiatrist, latches on to the pace of the transition:
The start of school was always a bittersweet time for me. It meant the end of another glorious, slow summer and the start of a packed, busy autumn. The way I generally coped was by organizing all my new books and talking to my classmates ahead of time so that I could get my feet wet again. Ultimately, it was getting through the first few days, which were always the hardest! Planning fun things to do after school with friends and sharing summer stories helped make the transition easier.
Sara Huzar, another of our psychotherapists, has a different slant on the subject:
Oh so many back-to-school anxieties! Would I be assigned to the "mean" teacher? Would I forget my violin on lesson day? Having to get up early again after a summer of snoozin' late... At one time or another, all of those things did happen, and they were challenging. But there were also things to look forward to: Art class! Playing in the orchestra! Assemblies! Field trips! Taco salad lunch day!
Back-to-School Through Paul's Eyes
As for me? Back-to-school anxiety was always present, but it changed from year to year. When I was eight, would the class bully pick on me? At sixteen, it was the pressure of knowing that junior year’s grades—and five Regents exams!—were the make-or-break for college admissions. But I think the middle school years were the most burdensome. In my district, all five elementary schools converged into one junior high. Suddenly there was a whole mix of socioeconomic differences, and new cultures, and feeling like a small fish in a way-too-big pond. I was thirteen, I had braces, my body was transforming daily like Frankenstein’s creation, and I can still remember those dreaded, endless fifteen minutes outside the building between bus drop-off and first class. Who should I talk to? What should I talk about? Why do they force kids at their most awkward stage of development to stand around and do nothing?
Very few of us feel we measure up on the first day of school, It could be our hair, our clothes, our acne. The fact that we bring a bag lunch while some kids get a hot lunch. It could be an unrequited crush, or the first time we’ve used an FM system.
If there's a child in your orbit feeling nervous about September, Sara Huzar recommends that you:
Listen to them and validate their feelings. No one ever got over feeling anxious by being told not to be! And help them balance those worries by seeing the whole picture: What was fun last year that will happen again this year? Any special skills they'll learn or privileges they'll get? What are they looking forward to? And even if it's just the cilantro rice on taco salad day... well hey, that's a place to start.
It’s common for kids—and parents—to feel anxious at the start of a new school year. Luckily, those jitters tend to calm as we get settled into our new routines. If you notice your child’s symptoms continuing beyond those first few weeks, it’s important to consider if perhaps something beyond the norm is happening either at home or in school that is creating anxiety for them. And, of course, we are here to help!
About the Author
Paul David Aguirre, LCSW-R, is the Director of the Baker Family Emotional Health and Wellness Center and has been with CHC since 2015. He attained proficiency in American Sign Language through his early career work at National Technical Institute for the Deaf in Rochester, NY, and has since worked extensively with children, adolescents and adults who are deaf, hearing and hard-of-hearing in all treatment modalities. Mr. Aguirre’s clinical approach uses adaptive attachment modeling and a strengths-based perspective to create a warm, supportive, life-affirming holding environment that empowers clients to achieve their personal and professional goals. Mr. Aguirre earned his Master’s Degree in Social Work at Adelphi University, New York, in 2007.
